Defiled-

Defiled

There she lies beneath torn ignorance
Veil after veil ripped away
Stains on white innocence
Tears will rule another day

Told all the things she wanted to hear
Naivety shielded her ears tight
Emotions were only fetuses
Virgins of wrong from right

Whispering sweetly in her ear
Lies sedate her from the pain
Chocking, dying, she doesn’t know
Her mental wounds are pouring like rain

And she is bleeding-
The blindfold slips off
Buried all at once by exposure
The days are lost, her youth is lost
And there will never lie closure

She puts her hand out to be loved
Reality is too wild and vicious
Life-in a frenzy- rapes harder
Granting all death wishes

And as breath seeks it’s last departure
And the chains and thorns comfort the ride
A sleeping beast is rising
The conscious breaking to the outside

Who am I? Dare I let the past defeat
The scars only signs of war
Inside myself I am, I am
An asylum
Perhaps worse than before

And I am cold
And I am numb
A shell who’s lost it’s purpose and core
Vicious knowledge rapes bliss
Taunting life’s little whore

From my fear
Ashes of insecurity
Rose the demons of my lorn
I could not say I died this long night
For I was destroyed before I was born

They cradled me in filthy paws
Distorted love had it’s birth
I cling to myself-these dragons
The sick embryos of self worth

And as I grew-my incarnations
They imprisoned me and kept me far
Until this day they never failed me
Except when they held me behind these bars

Phaz

Love letter to Failure

I ask myself with inexorable fervor
Where did I go wrong?
What words should have never escaped?
when I was pretending to be strong

Now, how will I mend
the bridges I have destroyed?
I wonder now, is it too late?

…my former lover, Regret,
he’s hysterical with jealousy
Because now
Failure is my Soul mate.

Stroke after stroke
line after line
I paint my paramour on the walls of my life
.
A portrait of Failure
My dear, Failure
In my heart
remains your knife
–Phazero

Mi corazon/bleeding Day 3-(from the infamous red spiral)

Why are you crying for the world
Opening your heart for all of them
When I am the only one listening
Listening through you
They think
this is all a game
I know
You’re hurting
I know This death
Too weak to die again
When all of the opposite sex makes you quiver in fear
The predators awaiting the slaughter
Of you and your emotions
Blood on the walls

I can hold them (your emotions) safe
If only for one night
To reassure you, love
You are not wasted
You can be lost in my world
Show me yours
Sleep well, laugh, play, know the joy of innocence
But feel what only maturity can show you.
This is no Childs game
Its bliss
All your worries, all the notes, everything that once destroyed you
Its gone
There is only you
And I
-zero, to my adoration

Hi, May I sit here? Oh, Your artwork is dark yet beautiful…and so is your soul

Did I tell you that last night? I met a super villain
Taking hearts and screaming names
or at least I wanted to scream his as he dissected

He detected, every Disguise

That I foolishly believed that years could hide

Quick wit and a joker’s smile

Laughing

I’m having a break down and he’s laughing

Crashing, I’m Running

from the sun light, the flash in the night, of me, my personality

Why is he able, How can he see?

Knees held close and tightly

eyes shifting to passing cars
His eyes burned holes through me, reading my body

all of my scars

I’m pushing him away, he’s pulling me in, I’m playing a chess game with a master

I am normally the queen, He’s about to win

He sips his beer, asks me who I am? I wait

Stutter, wait, I begin, He finishes

Like he has followed behind me,

stalking as I gained a new secret and tucked it away

In a box where a little girl who was outspoken became broken

and painted black all days

And I was thinking that I would die by my own hands, alone and misunderstood, if destiny would not save me from pain, maybe, Oh just maybe I could

I flirted with the reaper, sliding down to flatline,

I laughed at danger,

I walk in a world

where I am a stranger,

yet this day, he comes, just like me but stranger,

and he dissects me like an angel sent from hell

to let me know that I am not really that different or maybe I am, and only he could tell

I have opened my heart, a hopeless romantic at worst

Too bad my luck has once and always rhymed with curse

to survive, to thrive, it is always best to leave it close and closed,

disposed

Yet here comes this villain, this smiling fool, thief of the night, sitting before me, breathing down my neck,

You fiend, My mind screams, You’re not supposed to know that I am a wreck

telling me what I want to hear, reading all the notes of my heart that I cannot bear,

He’s into me, a one sided mirror, my dark side he seduces and doesn’t fear her

Slits in his eyes, a snake, a hero, am I falling apart or am I falling for you?

Cool, Calm, Collected

Sweeps my hair and touches my face, passionate yet disinterested

You are driving me crazy

He says ‘it didn’t even phase me’

I finally open up, since I’m wasting out already

He kindly lets me try to impress him, press him, I try, I do, too his surprise I break him too

We share dreams of destruction, constructing

a bond like we had been one another’s for years

staring into his eyes and through him, him through me,

a mental war we play with  and laugh, I sighed

the man even romanticizes suicide,

like I did on the pages of notebooks that will never be seen, oh god I pray they never be seen

He asks Why?

Why?

Yes, Why?

Why aren’t you dead yet?

I am.

I tell him, I killed myself a long time ago

and he holds me close and says,

Yes, my love, I know.

—-Written by Phazero——

yin and yang part 1

Yin and yang (part 1)
—Phazero

I’m not supposed to be sexual
I’m told
Forced
Perpetual
A harlot, am I? For demanding that my body be worshiped
Oh and not by any, no. society be damned
I want to rise and fall like a queen over her king-dom
Watch, Those smoke-on-a-cold-night grey eyes looking up at me
As your ancestors roll in their graves, jealous
Jealous that what they defiled in the back of wood sheds
And were too ashamed to love
The skin the they deemed to be a mark of slaves though it covered their forgotten children,
You pray to every inch of it
Open and willing, a rebel who rubs his flag over my every curve
And I shutter and you mutter “Scream for me”
I comply and pull you close and give you my command
“Yes, Master” you exhale and whisper to me
and I giggle at the irony
I’m so wet, your sweat, tracing down your bone straight chest hair
Mixing with the sweetness, my sugar cane musk, that you must suck dry
The smell that would drive you mad before
When I would kiss you on the cheek and call you my best friend

Asexual

I am precious,
I am rare,
I am intelligent
I am No one,
Nobody gives a fuck
Because independence is not in style
And I’m full of a little too much fight
Because you can not grip your hands around my wit
And no one can rub their dick in between my insight
So apparently I am useless.
And though this voice can bring a grown man to his knees
He is only concerned with what I can do on mine
so Fuck Him, Fuck Them, Fuck You!
Oh, I swear I faked it every single time
Because you will Never be big enough
Thick enough
Long enough
To reach My Heart!
You can not thrust hard enough to make my soul come
From beneath the walls of nights it built around itself,
Each one preceding the suns that I thought would never rise
And in the center of this dark, beneath screaming skies, It glows over an ocean of all the fears I cried,
and it shines and shines and shines for I, the poet, the poets
For the dreamers, for the silent streamers
That exploded when she sat down one night in front a notebook with a pen and her birthday finally came again.
She cried and shouted for the very first time on each page and spilled her blood into each word that she struggled to say,
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday. She had been reborn, because she found out that there lies more deep inside her,
Than just a moist place for a man to keep his dick warm.